The Conundrum of Money and Abundance: A hate-love relationship

So, what is money, anyway? A bunch of paper that has been given a value that supposedly is backed up by something harder to carry around, such as gold bars. It’s what took the place of trade (you have what I want but I have nothing to trade for it—here, have some money). It pays for goods and services, some of which we need, like food, gas, electricity and shelter. And really, we all know what money is. We can pull it out of our wallets and look at it.

So, perhaps the real question is, “what does money mean?”

Money is the root of all evil. Wanting it means you’re an associate of the devil It’s materialistic, it interferes with our spiritual growth, it’s power and control—someone else’s over us—like the devil… So, apparently, according to the general, Christian world view, the devil needs money… well, technically, he doesn’t but he knows we do, and he’s part of the earthly plane, just like the rest of us. A plane, if you will, that is made up of materials, like earth and stuff.

There’s a theme here… material world=materialism=materialistic. So, money is evil because it belongs to this plane. Blah, blah, blah.

And by the way, God doesn’t want or need money, being on an ethereal plane, so why should we? Well, we aren’t god, for starters. We live here on planet earth. And since we aren’t using trade and barter for survival, we need money.

So, what should money mean? When it comes right down to it, it can mean anything we want it to. I’ve spent years telling myself stories about money—stories that haven’t served me well. I could tell them now, but they were over five minutes ago.

Here’s what money means to me: Love. Compassion. Joy. Inner Peace. Making the world a better place because we can help others and ourselves. A tool for us to reach our highest good and lift each other up. Opportunity to reach our destinies more easily (there is nothing wrong with easy, either, that’s another myth and another post).

Of course, by now you are wondering, “really, Pen Umbra, what is the big conundrum here? Sounds like you figured it out? So?” So, here’s the conundrum: I finally started embracing what money means to me literally five minutes ago. And the conundrum is that up to that point, I let fear be my driving force around money and abundance, thus at this very moment, my financial abundance is looking pretty bleak. However, it’s just at this very moment, and five minutes from now, it’ll look better. And here is why:

In taking stock of my money and abundance, I realized how often people help me in ways that aren’t readily identifiable to my financial well-being. Friends and family take me out to dinner. My sister buys tickets to the Museum of the Pacific for my daughter and me. A friend is giving me a webcam and microphone she isn’t using so I can Skype with friends in New Zealand and elsewhere. Skype is giving me the opportunity to connect with these friends and possibly a life-partner. My dad is driving four and a half hours to replace a belt in my car so I don’t have to pay for labor. My sister is coming to visit over the weekend to take me out to dinner and help de-stress me. And all these things that people have given me means I didn’t have to pay for them myself. Yes, it’s an odd way of looking at financial abundance—money I didn’t spend on these things means more money for bills, groceries, gas, et al. And the bonus—getting to spend time with loved ones.

Yes, I am abundant! And grateful for it!

Oh, the Tangled Webs We Unweave! Life lesson learned while untangling a capiz shell curtain

Anything that has become tangled can always be untangled. This takes time, patience and diligence.

No matter where the tangle is, starting with an end is the best course of action.

Sometimes more tangles are created during the untangling process. Don’t worry—they will have sorted themselves out once you are finished.

If it’s a really big tangle, you may need to look at it and work on it from different angles. Sometimes you even have to give it a few shakes to loosen the knot(s).

Occasionally, it’s necessary to pull apart the threads—a sharp, thin, pointy object may not be the preferred object, but it is often the most effective.

Once finished, you may feel a sense of relief, satisfaction and/or joy.

What are your tangles and how can you apply this strategy to your own life?

The Conundrum of Not Enough Time… or How to Nurture Yourself in 15 Minutes or Less

If you don't have time to read the entire post, skip to the suggestions.

The Story: I was contemplating my current stress level and its effects on my body (exhaustion), and how I never “seem to” have time for me anymore, even the little things. I know that I am not alone. As busy parents, spouses, workers, students, and just people in general, we take time to make lunches and dinners, fold laundry, and scoop the litter box, but how often do we take time for ourselves and no one else? For myself, I seem to hit a point of “critical mass,” then spend two days exhausted and incapable of anything other than “stealing” away some quiet time and letting my inner child have some breathing room. As I pondered, I realized that giving oneself the gift of nurturance doesn’t have to be difficult or time consuming. Here are some suggestions that take 15 minutes or less.

The Suggestions: Remember, nurturing yourself and/or spending a little time with your inner child isn't about taking care of anyone else. This is about you and only you. For those consumed with schedules and deadlines (self-imposed or otherwise), set a timer for 5 to 15 minutes. This way you can devote the entire time to being present with your "activity" without looking at the clock every 30 seconds. The timer will let you know when to stop. For those not consumed by timelines, skip this step.

15 Minutes or less:

Grab your favorite book and read

Color or finger paint with your children (instead of cleaning house while your child is being creative); don’t have children—color or finger paint with your inner child

Read a poem

Play with your dog or cat

Plant seeds or pull weeds (this is also very grounding)

Write one morning page (Julia Cameron recommends writing three, but for hectic schedules, it may be easier to write for 15 minutes and throw out the page count)

Don’t like to write? Fill a page with drawings/doodles

Grab a glass of wine, cup of tea, or just yourself and go outside to look at the stars and moon

Work on a jigsaw puzzle

Meditate

Read or write a blog

Play a game of solitaire with real cards

Daydream

Read your favorite children’s book to yourself

Go for a walk

Admire the flowers in your yard (better yet, pick a few and put them in a vase)

Look at a picture book

5 minutes or less (if you just can’t give yourself 15 minutes)

Doodle/Draw

Write half of a morning page (or however much you can write in 5 minutes)

Light a candle or two in your bedroom; change into your bedclothes by candlelight

Use your favorite, special cream after your shower instead of waiting for a special moment to use it

Wash up for the night by candlelight

Light a few candles before your morning shower

Sing in the shower

Play your favorite song from childhood while brushing your teeth

Pet your cat or dog

Daydream or meditate

Wear mismatched socks (I highly recommend Little Miss Matched: http://www.littlemissmatched.com/ -- they have women’s and men’s lines, as well as children's)

Look at the moon or stars

Admire the flowers in your yard (better yet, go smell them)

Savour a small piece of chocolate

Put on your favorite, most comfortable pajamas long before bedtime

If you have ideas, please post them. These suggestions are mostly more in touch with the “feminine” side, because I’m…. well, a woman, and to be honest, most of the men I know aren’t the self-nurturing-inner-child types. I don’t know if men nurture themselves or not, and if the more enlightened ones do, how they do it. However, for any men reading this, please post your thoughts--I'd love to hear them.